So, faithful readers and fellow compatriots Apple has unloaded their new mobile operating system today upon the slobbering masses.
You may, and should, ask yourself: "What does the incomparable Dane Barbados Jr. think of it?"
In short, your liege lord and better thinks that it sucks. It's slow, cumbersome and an affront to one's eyes. Your humble narrator had to cleanse his vision by watching his comely handmaidens perform nude jumping jacks for an hour. The new way Safari handles tabs is a fine example with a three dimensional view of tabs, from above, which may be flashier, but is less efficient than what came before.
Outside of the flaws in the new iOS, a more pressing issue is that despite the added features and questionable circle-laden UI changes Dane Barbados Jr. still had more features with a jailbroken iPhone.
Am I expected to applaud these small, incremental, additions with a conditioned Pavlovian response? No. That is for lesser men.
Android users have enjoyed for years features that Apple users got today. The nearly rancid leftovers of another man's meal may be fine eating for Apple's squealing sycophants but it does not suffice for one such as I.
Let the sheep continue to wait with excitement for scraps, Dane Barbados Jr. is, and will remain, a Shepard. The best of Apple died with Steve Jobs.
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